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Reply to an angry message

Something landed in your inbox that made your heart rate go up.

Longconflictdifficult
Someone has sent me an angry message. Help me reply well.

Before drafting:
1. Separate the factual claims from the emotional framing. List the facts.
2. Tell me which of their complaints are legitimate, even partly. Be honest rather than diplomatic.
3. Tell me what they most want: to be fixed, to be heard, or to be compensated.

Then write a reply that:
- Opens by acknowledging the specific problem, not their feelings in the abstract.
- Concedes what is true, briefly and without grovelling.
- Corrects what is wrong, once, with facts and no defensiveness.
- Ends with one concrete next step and a time.
- Does not match their register, and never uses the word "calm".

Flag any line where I am arguing to win rather than to resolve.

Their message:
My side:

Making it yours

  • Paste your own material where the prompt asks for it. Everything above that line is instruction, not content.
  • Delete any rule that does not apply to you. A shorter prompt that fits beats a thorough one that does not.
  • If the answer comes back vague, add a line saying what you do not want. Constraints work better than encouragement.

Hard news and conflict. Bad news, apologies, angry replies, boundaries and feedback that has to survive in writing.

Related prompts

Deliver bad news in writingA slipped deadline, a cancelled project, a decision that will land badly.Apologise properly, onceYou got something wrong and the apology needs to land before the excuse does.Set a boundary in writingMessages at midnight, creeping scope, or a pattern you need to name once.Give difficult feedback in writingThe conversation has to happen in text and you get one shot at the wording.Write a resignation or offboarding noteYou are leaving and the note will outlive the feelings you have today.Bad news in the first lineA slipped deadline or a cancelled plan that somebody will be unhappy about.

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